If the Word Useless Were a Concept Vehicle…

Photo From Hyundai

It’s a known fact that the more rich you are, the more eccentric you are allowed to be in the eyes of society. As such, if you are a multi-billion dollar corporation, as a collective entity you’re allowed to be pretty damn unconventional from time to time, so long as that bottom line is in the black.

I mention this since the rationale “because we can” seems to be the only reason behind Hyundai’s recent one person transportation vehicle prototype.

They call it the E4U, and it’s designed for…you know I’m really not sure. I can tell you it can move in any direction, but only in an omni-directional manner, thanks to its kickstand style wheel substitutes. Also it’s apparently not much faster than the average pedestrian, which is really for the best considering the view of one of these rocketing towards you is probably a declaration of war somehow.

Unveiled at the Seoul  motorshow, details about this transport device are few, including if it will ever see release and what combination of hallucinogens and uppers were taken that allowed the E4U to be conceptualized and produced, without killing everyone involved.

Since we know so little about it, I have a few personal questions that need answering:

  • Why is its brow furrowed? Has it anticipated our mockery and is displeased?
  • Are there any features that prevent neighborhood kids from pushing it over, or turning it in the opposite direction, besides their inability to stop laughing?
  • Can Hyundai build the Death Star they got the rider’s helmets from instead?
  • Is its inability to be operated by the obese intentional, or just a gross marketing oversight?
  • Finally, in a pinch, can I duck into this thing to shield myself from Mega Man’s blasts?